When tragedy happens, all you want to do is be with your family. When I say ‘family’, I don’t just mean your little family comprising of parents and children. I mean the big family–grandparents, uncles, aunties, cousins, distant relatives.
I find myself wondering why I wanted to leave the Philippines so much. In my youth, I knew I wanted to leave. Such is the curse of traveling young. Once you’ve seen some of the world, you just don’t want to go back home. Leaving home and living in a foreign country has made me into who I am now. And I love what I have turned into as a result of all the places I have seen, people I have met and the experiences I have been through. However, now that I have a daughter, I sometimes wish I wasn’t so far away.
I have recently received some sad news of the death of one of my aunts. And it has made me feel miss home. Or even just being close to home.
Sometime, I wish things could have been simpler. What would have happened if I never left home? If I found a job I loved where my parents live? If I ended up marrying someone in my neighbourhood? If I ended up settling close to where my family is? A lot of my new friends here are like that. They grew up in this town, left for college and eventually came back to settle when they had families. As a result, they have family and friends close by.
But to be honest, even if I wanted that kind of life, it wouldn’t be the same somehow. Most of my siblings also live overseas. Most of my childhood friends have also left. Not somehow the same.
Maybe things will change and one day, my family won’t be so far apart from each other. But until then, I guess I would just have to keep missing.
funny isn’t it… some people stop at the borders of their island, others venture far beyond its shores
[lumipat na kami ng whoa-press!]
aw. condolences beth.
i sometimes feel the same way as you do.
yes, my condolences too beth.
{{ hugs }}
Jem–I miss you and hope to see you and meet Craig in the summer perhaps?
Yas–Thanks. It sucks doesnt it?
Odette–Thank you.
such is the dilemma of our generation…it seems that we have too many choices. i am thankful though that we can choose what to do and where to live, but as you say, there will always be trade-offs.
i just hope we can raise our families the best we can wherever we may be.
my condolences to you and your family.
Thanks Donna. And you are right, there are pros and cons about having left the Phils. And I really should be thankful for the kind of life I have led. I just really wish sometimes that my family can see more of Aeyen. Or that she could see more of them. Because both parties are really missing out on a lot…